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Tuesday, October 18, 2005

I want to be more...I need to be more...

I no longer see my blog as an art-form.
My entries have been becoming progressively more dead-pan and distanced from my actual life.

I had so much of a desire to keep you away from the confusing things. Life isn't simple for me...because I think too much. It's a temptation to use my blog as another medium for thoughts. But I've tried not to.
I didn't want to talk about other people...
And I didn't want to blog about my day.
It left me nothing to blog about but love and hate--
You'd think that being an extremist I'd have a lot of idiosyncracies. Well, I don't.
I like to feel comfortable with things. I like to tell myself I don't have a problem with it. I reason myself out of irrational love or hatred for anything because it annoys me when other people do it. It doesn't seem to be very calculated.
So I don't know how I happened...or how I ever thought a blog was a good idea.

It's funny how everyone who starts a blog thinks they're making a page that's worth something. Whether you have high-hopes or faltering ones, everyone wishes they could stand out, be something new--different--known--appreciated.
And there are thousands of blogs in the world. You'd think people would learn.
I'm accepting the fact that I am a speckle of dust. My blog is my place for me to be me...but no one wants to see me.

Don't listen to the Enemy when he tells you to "be yourself". Are you kidding? No one wants to see you, and if they say they do they're lying through their teeth...they're attacks of the Enemy trying to appeal to your pride! All the world really wants to see is more of Jesus! That's what they need, and that's what you're here to show them. --D.B.B (wise old man)

A speckle of dust--my biggest potential is to pass into the light and reflect the Lord.

You must make the decision to forsake all. This means forsaking not only the material...but also yielding to Me the thing that is difficult to yield, the thing that Satan desires to control--your mind, your thoughts, your own ideas, your own intellect.



Help.

5 comments:

Anonymous AGV said...

Remember what I said about your blog?
To me, Your blog is NOW worth reading.
Never renounce to what you are and what you feel, that is the greatest gift you can give. Not your brilliance, your wit, your perfectly wrought masterful melodies, but your heart.

-- Talk to the world like you talk to me and it will stop to listen --

10/18/2005 8:04 AM  
Blogger Florence said...

Thank you.
I don't deserve that.

10/18/2005 3:07 PM  
Anonymous AGV said...

you deserve every good thing...and you'll have it.
your most reedeeming quality is the ever present desire to change... it'll take you far...
it'll make you into a better instrument.

*hugs*

10/18/2005 7:56 PM  
Blogger aiko said...

Well said, Flo.

10/18/2005 11:35 PM  
Blogger Florence said...

Why thank you, Aich. *nuzzle*

10/19/2005 10:14 PM  

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