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Friday, May 16, 2008

The One Where Florence Bakes A Cake

Apparently the part in that last questionnaire where I answered Yes to "Have you ever baked a cake without a recipe?" stirred some members of my home to a little incredulous-ness on the subject. I tried to defend myself by getting my mom to admit to everyone that I used to bake a lot of cakes and cookies when I was young (and restless), but apparently she didn't remember as much of that as I do. My pride being thus prodded, I decided to redeem myself by doing the unthinkable...I baked a birthday cake. (The poor helpless person whose birthday fell on the day that I felt the need to bake a cake. Happy birthday, Kazue!!!)
Since I'm definitely NOT a fblogger (alternate names include foologger, fooderblooger, and floobooger, but they basically all mean "one who blogs on the topic of food") I did not take a picture, nor will I post the recipe for it (as if I could remember it after all the spur-of-the-moment substitutions, generally not a good idea).

Things I knew before I started baking my cake:
Baking a cake for a Family home sometimes is a considerable amount of work.
Generally cakes are baked by throwing ingredients together into a bowl and mixing (wildly, if you want ANY FUN at all).
Baking a cake requires an oven and a pan.

Things I knew after I baked my cake:
Baking a cake for a Family home is definitely a considerable amount of work and it will take up all of your free time.
There is more than one way to "mix" a cake: one must "blend", "combine", or (my personal favorite), "cut and fold".
It is not okay to "mix until I feel like it's ready". One must resist the temptation to continue mixing, at a certain point, lest they end up with a birthday pancake.
One must hope for a recipe that is more specific than "some salt", lest they multiply their recipe by 10 and end up with instructions that read "quite a hefty amount of salt".
One must not leave one's cake in the oven 10 minutes longer "just in case".
One must be sure one has all the necessary ingredients in the house before one begins. One should at least make sure one has all the missing ingredients on a list and a suitable amount of money before one goes out to the store. If one does not do this, one may end up going back to the store 4 times (Oh Lord).

And I have not changed my stance on the matter of cooking; I did not enjoy a single moment of it. There was not even a five minute inspiration-high in the beginning of it...not a single drop of happiness except a little fleeting feeling of glee when my batter first started to look like chocolate milk and I thought "Lordy, I've wasted all the ingredients!!!" The Lord gave me JUST enough joy to see the task through, and not an ounce more. This experiment was purely for the sake of changing up stuff and not being an old bottle, so I will continue to be a new bottle and hop right on to other things.


Anonymous Junior said...

Hahaha!!! That has got to be one of the funniest posts I have read in a while. I laughed so hard. It probably would have sounded queer ,me laughing so hard all by myself, hope no one heard , but I'm sure they heard me, it's hard not to be heard when one laughs like I do. Anyway, that's great. You cooking in the kitchen is such a funny, about as funny as me trying to write a song. None the less I would have loved to have a piece of your cake Flo. I love you and keep posting, your posts make my day a little brighter when I read them.

5/16/2008 3:23 PM  
Anonymous win said...

Hahahahahahahaha!!! Do u hear that florie? i mock. just in case u missed that.
no really, txs for the laugh. & c'mon, just between u & me, u enjoyed it a leeetle, no?

5/17/2008 12:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I liked this post... very much. Especially the part that talks about the "considerable amount of time" going into making a cake for a family Home.

5/20/2008 11:51 AM  

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